Billionaire

When you hear the word "billionaire," who comes to mind?

I've got a billion dollars
I own the night
I own the skyline
Black tie and smiles
But inside I'm raging

Like I said in a previous entry on "Secret Identity," one of my goals is to write a song based on a very famous licensed character, make enough money to put my kids through college and not get sued.

Look behind the mask
There's a little boy
In a dark back alley
Two pools of blood
In the pale moonlight

Armored car and armored vest
I've got my own symbol across my chest
And I don't need a gun
To get justice done...

I've grown up with comic book culture. I don't claim to be a huge fan of any one character or title. As a kid I enjoyed the feel of the pulpy pages and exploring the issue from cover to cover: Ads promising boxes of toy soldiers for less than $2; pages showing transistor radios, acoustic guitars and other items that could be earned by selling subscriptions to stationery; way too serious letters to the editor; the always puzzling pages of T-shirts with adult messages I didn't fully understand and, my personal favorite, a solid page of cheap novelties. Oh, and sea monkeys.

At times the actual stories seemed almost secondary. Here's where I managed to borrow a few lines from Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots:

Got a thousand bruises
No regrets 
And no excuses
I discipline my body
Got to be strong to fight them

Most of the time superheroes fought supervillains or even other superheroes for complicated reasons. But I always felt like the best stories involved a hero coming to the aid of the defenseless against seemingly impossible odds.

I watch over the city
Hear the screams
Of innocent victims
I climb, I glide, I brawl
Driven by the need to save them all

If I had a secret life, I think I would always be on the verge of giving myself away. Especially if I met someone who seemed genuine, who seemed like she might have already guessed.

Met her at a party
Red hair, black velvet
I wondered as we were dancing
Could she understand?

Met her at a party
Black hair, red velvet
I wondered as we were dancing
Did she understand?

Thanks for reading, hope you enjoy the song.

Seven Story Christmas Tree

I wrote this song last weekend and had it all ready to share on Christmas Eve Eve, Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, but somehow it never felt like the right time. Well, at least I'll have something for next year.

I wrote it thinking of when my wife and I were dating, that time when making my wife laugh was one of my biggest goals in life. Being silly came easy then; now it's takes work to be lighthearted. But even going to the grocery store by ourselves can seem romantic if you have the right mindset.

Just because we met today
Doesn't mean it can't last forever
The lights and the music
Didn't mean much yesterday
It's Christmas Eve, let's celebrate

I was also thinking of that scene in Elf where Buddy the elf and Jovie go out for the first time. It's one of my favorite scenes from any movie, with You Make Me Feel So Young as the background song.

It's no secret that I like your smile
And we can walk the shops together
I'll wear your mittens, 
You wear my big gloves
It's Christmas Eve, let's celebrate

Christ Child and Nativity
Seven story Christmas tree
Skating and hot cocoa
Like living in a snow globe
Yesterday was dull and gray
Now the colors of your pretty face
Bring the city back to life
Now it's good-bye for tonight...

Hope you enjoy the song throughout the year.

Wendy and Peter:

My family and I were staying at the Pop Century Resort at Walt Disney World. It's on the lower end of the Disney resorts, price-wise, but some of my fondest memories are of being there together, playing in the pool or eating dinner in the cafeteria.

I had taken my ukulele instead of my guitar due to space restrictions. We had driven from Ohio to Florida in our minivan with another family.

One afternoon, we were in our room getting ready to head to the computer pool. It's a pool with a large replica of a laptop hanging from a nearby building.

I was strumming the Red Hot Chili Peppers song "Scar Tissue." That song goes: F - C - Dm, but then I added A7/C7 as the last chord in the progression, which changed the feeling. A7 didn't do it. Neither did C7. It needed the combo.

The mermaids and the pirates haven't captured me so far
I've invited this invasion, you stand here by my side
With your ribbons and your thimbles and your eyes filled up with stars
I look at you with wonder, and now I realize

With your gentle hands, warm as sand,
You sooth the frightened child
Your delicate smell and your mannerisms
Threaten my untamed wild

When you come near my instinct is to run...

We had just just ridden Peter Pan's Flight, based on the 1953 Disney cartoon version of Peter Pan. That version of the story is lighthearted and full of adventure.

But it doesn't really capture the conflict that Peter feels about Wendy: he's fascinated by her and drawn to her femininity, but he has no intention of giving up his boyish wildness and freedom. 

The 2003 version does capture that, along with bittersweet feeling of the unfinished bonus-feature ending, from J.M. Barrie's original book and play, where Peter comes back to the nursery to find things have changed.

Anyway, I wanted to get some of that conflict into my song. I was 30 when when my wife and I got married. A few years later, I had just bought this really cool shark kite that I planned to fly as soon as possible when my wife showed me the double lines of our pregnancy test. Clearly, I had some growing up to do.

The indians and the fairies are calling me to play
And I'm thinking up excuses for the first time in my life
In the morning you say you're leaving, inside I'm begging you to stay
But I won't grow up, you can't fill me up with your husbands and wives

With your gentle hands, warm as sand,
You sooth the frightened child
Your delicate smell and your mannerisms
Threaten my untamed wild

When you come near my instinct is to run...

Standing there in our Disney hotel room, we had two little girls and my wife was pregnant with our little boy. Like Peter looks at Wendy, I am in awe of my wife's intelligence, hard work, sweetness and thoughtfulness. I guess all of those things came together at the right time. 

I needed an ending, so I borrowed one of the best ever:

Wendy, tramps like us, baby we were born to run...

Strange Perfume:

This is a fictionalized retelling of the way I met my wife.

They met at the time clock
He was starting night shift
They used the same Macintosh

At the time, we both worked for a newspaper in the production department, meaning that we put the newspapers together, both the editorial content and the ads.

She left him fortune cookies
He liked the smell of her strange perfume
They took the same day off

I was on an ad team, creating display ads for real estate agents, plant nurseries, local doctors and dentists, and so on. She worked on a different ad team and also built pages. The day shift and night shift shared computers, all Macs.

They met at the museum
They found brilliant colors everywhere
The sun shone brighter

He searched into her green eyes
They were telling him a story
Everything comes out fine
But with lots of complications...

Which is how it goes when you're falling for someone. Everything seems better, more colorful, more meaningful.

The main chord progression was my attempt to sounds like the Posies' "Dream All Day" but but without learning that song. I find that can be a good starting point for a new song.

But the break, where the song slows down, was really inspired by my brother-in-law and bandmate, Clay Justice. It's not so much that he plays in that style; it's just he had told me how much he liked songs that change tempo, get faster or slower, and so on. So I doubt I would have slowed the song down without his influence. 

Plus, I was trying to sound like the Beatles.

Prayers, diapers laughter
Tears, money, mercy
They built a life together
The end, gratefully ever after...

I am grateful to God for what I have, my wife, kids, job, food, shelter, clothes, enough money to give, for his mercy and grace.

Hope you enjoy. Peace.

Glimmering City (Dystopian Novel):

I remember the Apple commercial from 1984. I've read that it only aired twice, and was only broadcast once, during the Super Bowl, on national TV.

I had not read the novel Nineteen Eighty Four at that point, but I had gathered its general plot and meaning through popular culture.

Many dystopian stories, movies and the like have come and gone since 1984. This song is my attempt to add to that list.

You don't know how far I have come
Tunneled through the earth
Walked the burning sands
Swam across the river
To reach the Glimmering City where you live
On the hundredth floor

At first I had lyrics about overthrowing an oppressive dictatorship, but as the song developed I decided to imply that theme rather than state it outright.

You left your reflection in a broken mirror
I pieced it together and traced it here
I see your worried look so let me say
Why would you want to be normal anyway?

So the scene is a sleek, modern high-rise apartment. There's a beautiful girl living a comfortable life, tended by mechanical servants. There's a boy standing in front of her, looking somewhat dirty and wild. Is it a literal mirror that he refers to, or maybe an electronic device storing her image? I don't know. But the image of her face has moved him to action.

Leave these machines behind
Come join my rebel friends
We'll build a who new life from our bare hands
Leave these machines behind
Come join my rebel friends
We'll build a who new life from our bare hands...

I had written some sketchy lyrics using guitar, and I had a tune in my head. I made it pretty far in the songwriting process before I decided to start over with new music and re-written lyrics. The music had come out too somber. The lyrics were more angry than sweet and persuasive. 

I turned to the ukulele. I've found that ukuleles are usually dismissed as novelty instruments, but I think of mine as a simplified mandolin. It gives a song a small, rustic sound. 

After some trial and error, I found a chord progression that I had not played before: F to BbMaj7 to C. It was the airy Maj7 that opened up the song for me, letting in light and hope.

A common dystopian theme is the government strictly enforcing a bland existence, with few opportunities for pleasure, in order to control the masses.

However, as seen in Brave New World and Wall-E, it's much more effective to control a population by saturating the people with consumerism and entertainment. 

If a dystopian government really knows what it is doing, it will provide manufactured controversies in the news, constantly changing tastes in fashion and so on. It would be hard to tell the fictional news from the real thing, and the average citizen wouldn't know or care to know the difference. That's what's going on in the Glimmering City. 

So it's a hard sell for a young man with few possessions to arrive on the hundredth floor and ask this young woman to give up her luxurious life. He really only has one argument on his side: an emotional appeal to her sense of adventure and the unknown. 

When's the last time you felt cold?
When's the last time you felt scared?
When's the last time you felt alive?
Come take my hand, I'll lead you there...

I have always loved the song The Sounds of Silence, even when I was a little kid. It's funny to think that such a weird, dark, quiet song could have been popular on the radio in its own time. But it's that strange beauty that and storytelling that gets our attention, even today.

I had been reading the book of 1 Kings, where King Jeroboam commands that his workers make two golden calfs for the people to worship. It made be think of the neon god from Paul Simon's song, so I quote two lines in my song as a tribute.

And the people bowed an prayed
To the neon god they'd made
I hear security coming down the corridor
They're beating on the door, beating down the door!

Now the young man has made his case. Finally, there's a decision that needs to be made.

Leave these machines behind
Come join my rebel friends
We'll build a who new world from our bare hands...
Leave these machines behind
Come join my rebel friends
We'll build a who new life from our bare hands...

Secret Identity:

One of my life goals is to write a hit song about a heavily licensed character, make enough money to put my kids through college and not get sued.

This song was my first attempt:

I don't want you to apologize
For the way you look tonight
Your hair's a mess and you tore your dress
Like you just came from a fight

Bracelets are glowing
Muscles are showing
Boots say you're ready to go
Glasses can't hide
The wonder inside
And there's so much that I'd like to know...

This is the first song I wrote with chords strung together, one after another, with the goal of increased musicality. At first I thought it was a mistake because I wasn't sure I could get my hands into position fast enough. But this was the music I was hearing in my head, so I stuck with it and I hope listeners like it.

Appreciate the gift, but how did you lift
The piano into my apartment
Willing to bet that you don't break a sweat
Benching my whole set of weights

Bracelets are glowing
Muscles are showing
Boots say you're ready to go
Glasses can't hide
The woman inside

And there's so much that I'd like to know...

OK, so that's enough hints.

I think I've guessed your... secret identity.

Who's Gonna Pay?

It's a good question before you go out to dinner. It's a better question to ask before you die. I am a follower of Jesus. 

I was very proud and somewhat arrogant in my twenties. I liked to argue, even if I didn't know much about the subject. I found myself getting louder and louder, while at the same time I knew I was not being kind, considerate or even that thoughtful in my arguments.

A few times, those discussions ended in silence from the other side. It wasn't that I had won the debate, but I had lost communication with the other person due to my tone and inflexibility.

I became a christian at 29. I was lying in the bed of my studio apartment reading a book called Teach Yourself Christianity. There were other books in the series on various belief systems. I had attended a few church services and small group meetings over the previous few years, and I had been challenged to rethink my smug self assurance.

You may find yourself behind the wheel
Of a large, black, mind-blowing automobile
You may find yourself at the bottom of a well
Ces't la vie, goes to show you never can tell
You may find and obscene diamond ring on your hand
But tonight it's your soul that will be demanded...

I borrowed heavily throughout this song, starting with "Once in a Lifetime" by the Talking Heads. I read a book by David Byrne talking about how the band got started and so on. He said his lyrics were a sort of initiation of a preacher, but without the gospel message.

It occurred to me how weird it could be to turn one of his images into the start of a song that preached Christ crucified.

I quoted another favorite line from Chuck Berry's "You Never Can Tell."

The next image came from an episode of the The Flintstones where Fred gives Wilma an enormous diamond ring that he obtained from a less than reputable source.

Who's gonna pay, who's gonna pay?
Pocket lint, can't take it with you
Asbestos suit won't do you no good
Who's gonna pay, who's gonna pay?

There's parable that Jesus told about a rich man tearing down his barns to build bigger ones, but that night he died and was called to account. That's the idea behind the chorus. There's also a bit by Bob Hope saying that Bing Crosby had been looking at asbestos suitcases to take all his money with him.

You may find yourself (hey-hey) on a losing streak
You get by on a smile, oh yeah, but underneath
You may find all your lies finally catch up with you
Angry mob inside your head, you can't hide it under the bed.

The losing streak comes from "Satisfaction" by the Rolling Stones. This song was also inspired by the one-chord powerhouse "How You Like Me Now?" by The Heavy.

If you ever wake up at 3:16am and face a self-reckoning, you know what I mean when I say that Somebody paid.

You may find your eyes never get satisfied
By you've seen enough to know the score
You may find your heart full of unwashed socks
Try as you will you can't find a pill to make it better

Yep, that last image is from "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" by Doctor Suess, as sung so wonderfully by Thurl Ravenscroft. I had always been told it was Boris Karloff.

Hope you enjoy the music and the message resonates with you. Peace.

Face Like an Aging Movie Star:

I walked into the grocery store and noticed to a man standing at the Customer Service counter, possibly waiting to pick up his laundry cleaning or to buy a lottery ticket.

He was wearing a walking cast. He wasn't overly tall. He just past middle age and had a very handsome face, like someone famous. I didn't recognize him, though. He may have been a doctor, or an Olympic medalist in judo. He was in good shape and wore a dark V-neck T-shirt with a tan that suggested that he might be a snow bird up from Florida.

Anyway, the first line of the song came to mind:

Face like and aging movie star
Cuts his clothes from a magazine
Makes the scene, black muscle car
Gold cologne, smells like a king, like a king...

Steel blue eyes and a leather tan
Across his chest reads a woman's name
Keeps his money in a coffee can
So long ago he lost sweet Jane, sweet Jane...

I think of this song as a private detective movie. In my mind, I've cast Brad Pitt, looking about how he age by 2036.

Avoids police but he plays the game
There's always someone who needs to be found
Deep in the heart of the Everglades
Gators all know him by his first name, first name...

A trail of needles and bottle caps
Leads him to a ramshackle shack,
Blood on the door and the stench of death
Breathes through a clean, white handkerchief, handkerchief

My brother-in-law Clay suggested the opening single note run. I changed music behind the verses several times. It had to be something easy to play because there were a lot of words to remember in telling the story. 

Finally I landed on the chord progression Em-C-G-D, which is pretty common, as in "If You're Going to San Francisco" by Scott McKenzie, a song I've always liked.

Bullet holes and shattered glass
Body in the bed, eyes open wide
Deep in the shadows, corner of the room
A girl's sweet face too scared to cry, to cry

He carries her out, she's too week to fight
A lady friend puts her up for the night
He takes them out to this place by the lake
Baked potatoes and T-bone steaks all around, all around

This is the emotional heart of the song, where a competent man, someone good at doing his job, is confronted with the emotions of finding a little girl at the scene of a murder. In my imagination, the girl is filthy and frightened. 

I am a dad. As a kid I saw things and heard things that kids should not see or hear. My parents were both very loving and supportive. And yet, there were times during their divorce when it was very dark and ugly. 

The little girl has been neglected for so long, even before her mother was killed, that she welcomes the attention of two well meaning adults. The lady friend I imagine as a woman this gentleman had thought about asking to marry him, but for some reason it just never worked out. 

On a culinary note, of course, the little girl would probably want chicken fingers or mac and cheese from the kids menu along with crayons. But the handsome man isn't used to having kids around.

All the ways of a man
Seem right to him
But in the end they lead...

We all make choices, and if we have kids we pull them through those choices, good or bad.

He hunts down her father but he's out cold
Social worker says she'll do her best
Aunt and uncle have plenty of their own
Big brown eyes in a grown up mess, grown up mess

Hollow man with an empty heart
Pain, confusion, anger and pride
Never been anybody's daddy,
Prays with tears for the strength to try, to try

Has this ever actually happened in real life? A private detective finds a motherless child, tries to go through the proper channels to give her a home and finally decides to adopt her, likely at the same time marrying the woman he's cared for all these years.

Maybe in the movies. Starring Brad Pitt. Based on my song. Thanks for reading and listening!

Nesting Dolls:

I wrote this song thinking about being in a situation where you see someone's life kind of falling apart in front of you. You work with them, and likely they've never thought much about you. Just a friendly face. Small talk. TGIF. And on like that.

Set your expecations
Low enough and I
Just might be able to jump over them

Your pain will fade
As the days go by
You might find yourself getting over him

One Saturday morning, when the song was still green and hadn't solidified fully, I played it for my wife. She cried. And that's when I knew I had something.

I'm no prize
But I just might surprise you
I like spending time
Sitting here close beside you
You might have other plans
That's fine if you do...

I wanted to connect the feeling of opening a set of nesting dolls to the succession of faces we see in our journey though life. Some are passing through, some endure.

Like nesting dolls, life hides
Layers of different faces
Imagine my delight the first time I saw you

I feel closer to the center
Whenever we're together
I could be wrong but I hope you feel it too

I used the A to C#m change at the beginning of the verse, which I associate "Help," a song by a British band from the sixties called the Beatles.

I'm no prize
But I just might surprise you
I like spending time
Sitting here close beside you
You might have other plans
That's fine if you do...

Those last two lines of the chorus are acting. I've never actually been able to manage that feeling.

I made a 4-track recording and put it on my first CD, along with about 10 other songs. I asked my friend Kim at work if she was interested. She said yes. She came back to me later that day and said this was the song she liked best. I will always be thankful for her encouragement.

It's one of the few songs where I solo, and it's completely composed.

I hope you enjoy and pass on to others...

When I Became a Sofa:

The other day I was thinking about how sofas tend to accumulate coins, pretzels, crayons, and so on, under the cushions. So if you happened to be a sofa, you would have a few basic necessities covered. You'd also always know where the remote was.

When I became a sofa I had plenty to eat,
Crackers, crumbs and Cheerios
I had spending money, 
Yeah, I had pocket change
Pens, pencils and Mentos

I'm a big peppermint Mentos fan, although I have never felt good about eating them. They don't seem like legitimate food. Kind of like taffy.

Have you ever felt like a piece of furniture in someone else's life? I mean, you're there, but not necessarily noticed or appreciated.

When you'd lay down for a nap
Watch the TV or read a book
I treasured the time we would spend together
We'd keep each other warm
In the snow and nasty weather...

When I was growing up, my brother and I were often babysat by a friend of the family who had her green velvet sofa covered in clear vinyl. I never thought it was weird. I thought it was cool, and it made a fun sound when you sat down or shifted your weight.

When I became a sofa, I was there at your parties,
I was the one against the wall
I didn't like that guy who was giving you the eye
I tripped him up into the dip

When you'd lay down for a nap
Watch the TV or read a book
I treasured the time we would spend together
We'd keep each other warm
In the snow and nasty weather...

Years later, our family came into possession of that velvet sofa, minus the plastic cover. In college it became a place for friends to crash for the night. I normally ate my dinner sitting on that couch listening to the radio.

I eventually gave it away when I moved into an apartment that was too small to fit all of my hand-me-down furniture. It is probably still making someone's life a little better.

When I became a sofa, I looked the other way
You got a kitten that scratched my legs
Now I'm sitting by the curb, and I'm feeling so disturbed
I'll find another home and it will be OK

When you'd lay down for a nap
Watch the TV or read a book
I treasured the time we would spend together
We'd keep each other warm
In the snow and nasty weather...

Home is where the sofa is. Hope you enjoy!

Brother of Shared Meals:

When I was in college, I had a few close friends. One of them was Mike K. We rode bikes all over, looking for the places you can't see by car.

Exploring these ravines
Down in this hollow
Summer's heat blazing all around

Wading in knee deep
Ice cold pools and streams
Cool green shadows overrule

For me, college was a time to learn and grow. I barely paid attention to sports. I was more into books and exploring a part of town that was all new to me. Mike found a stream off to the side of the road with a deep, clear pool that we could wade into to cool off.

I thought I knew enough to talk over you
So full of myself, now I see what a fool
Reading books out loud,
Riding bikes at night
Clash playing on your stereo
And the city lights below...

Mike's old apartment doesn't exist anymore. It was demolished to make more parking spaces for a plasma clinic. But we spent many nights in his kitchenette discussing books we were reading. I read him the poems I was writing. He said that when I said the word "poetry" it sounded like "poultry," and that maybe I could start a new genre of poetry dedicated to chickens. I was probably deeply offended. We never really argued. But looking back, I was pretty hard-headed.

Brother of shared meals
Rice and beans and cheese
I find a five dollar bill

Walk to the corner store
To get your cigarettes
Two Coca-Colas, I can taste it still

Both of us had part-time jobs. Neither had a lot of money. Meals were simple. Finding money was kind of a big deal, at least for me. I actually remember finding a fiver in the middle of the road and splurging on Cokes, cookies or some other treat.

I thought I knew enough to talk over you
So full of myself, now I see what a fool
Reading books out loud,
Riding bikes at night
Clash playing on your stereo
And the city lights below...

One weekend Mike played every Clash CD back to back on his stereo with Cerwin-Vega speakers. I would not say I was a big Clash fan, but I grew to appreciate their songs especially from the London Calling album.

Lost in the supermarket...

That was years ago
Now we're graying at the temples
Our days are made of kids and jobs and wives

No going back, 
But sometimes a song, a scent
Can bring a long forgotten memory to life...

I remember doing bike maintenance up in Mike's apartment. One time his bike's chain broke and he couldn't get it back together. It was a hot summer night. There was no A/C and hardly any breeze. 

Mike, Omar, Sam and I took turns, sweat pouring down our faces, applying all of our concentration. Finally, using the little chain breaker tool, one of us was able to get the pin and plates back together. The relief. It was like we had cracked a safe with thousands of dollars waiting inside. Good times of camaraderie.

I thought I knew enough to talk over you
So full of myself, now I see what a fool
Reading books out loud,
Riding bikes at night
Clash playing on your stereo
And the city lights below...